Worst Blogs Ever

I feel I can not contain myself any longer. I must comment on a type of blog that is a plague on the world of web-based publishing. Much like gaming comics are to webcomics and furries are to sci-fi/fantasy/anime fandom, knitting blogs are the lowest of the low.

What are these people thinking? Who wants to read about someone’s ongoing knitting projects accompanied by pictures of cats laying about on piles of yarn. C’mon, the pace of knitting is glacial. You don’t see Fox running specials on Extreme Knitting!

Short of all of us calling our congressmen and women and getting a constitutional amendment outlawing knitting blog, this problem is not going to go away. Each one of us has to personally take a stand. For my part, like Charles Foster Kane, I am publishing a “Declaration of Principles” that this blog will adhere to.

1. I will not fill up this blog with descriptions in bone-crushing detail of my on-going knitting projects.

2. I will not link my blog to my Flickr or Webshots accounts in order to post a multiple of shots of yarn I just bought or of my works in progress.

3. I will not inflict my reading public with pictures of my dogs and/or cats. I’m sure other people are not interested in them. (Personally, I’m not that interested or fond of my own nasty beasts.)

4. I will not plug my local yarn shops in a fawning attempt to score yarn and/or knitting implements.

5. I will not link to knitting blogs of personal friends in the hopes of they will write something nice and link back to mine.

6. There is NO rule 6!

7. I will not put one of those fancy progress bars in the sidebar. (Mainly because I don’t know how to do it without locking up my computer and causing half the internet from melting down.)

8. Finally I will not get caught up in the newest knitting fad. No Ponchos! No Clapotis! No hand-dying woolen yarns with Kool-Aid! And what the hell is a Clapotis!